What is a Parenting Plan?
Often a divorce does not only involve the two divorcing individuals, but also ripples out to impact children who are part of the family. With children present, the situation of divorce may become slightly more complicated and require the need for shared parenting.
The decisions about the children and who they will live with and how their time will be shared between parents are critically important. Hence a Parenting Plan can help to detail agreed arrangements related to your children.
A parenting plan is an agreement of custody and/or visitation between the two parents, and who will be the primary carer for the child (if the agreement isn’t based on a 50/50 arrangement, where the child spends equal time with both parents).
A comprehensive parenting plan will include agreements over access days and hours as well as details on how holidays or other important dates like birthdays should be arranged.
Some parenting plans can even go into depth with mapping out agreements on how 3rd party partners should be introduced, diet, overseas travel and screen time restrictions, so that when the child is at both households they have more or less similar boundaries.
It is important for these concerns to be mapped out before the divorce takes place in order to minimise any issues arising or conflicts developing later down the line.
Here are the answers to some general queries parents have when creating a parenting plan:
Who Develops a Parenting Plan?
A parenting plan can be created between you and your former spouse yourself, if communication is still respectful and amicable.
Some divorcing couples engage a child-development expert, therapist, lawyer or mediator to assist.
When it is difficult to agree on decisions, a mediation process can be requested with a chosen/appointed expert, to help both parties put forward various concerns and suggestions.
A parenting plan requires both parties to work together and possibly make compromises, in order for a solution to be reached in the form of the parenting plan.
Who Pays for the Parenting Plan ?
Whilst some parents equally divide the costs of the creating a parenting plan, it really depends on the situation of the household. Some couples may split costs equally, others may agree to a different split based on the earning capacity of each spouse.
The Truced platform has an in-built wizard that can guide both parties through a parenting plan for a low monthly subscription fee. Alternatively the costs may consist of the hourly rate charged by the expert to create the Parenting Plan.
In some circumstances (where the relationship is still amicable), the parenting plan can be created between the couple, from scratch without cost.
How Long Does it Take to Create?
The time it takes to create a parenting plan, can’t be readily determined. It varies according to the level of friction, number of children involved, any special circumstances like illnesses, and the general family situation etc.
However, the smoother the communication between parents, the less time it should take to reach a sound compromise. For some parents, a few sessions with an expert may result in the creation of a plan and for some, even a number of weeks or months will not be enough to reach a good solution.
How Long Will the Parenting Plan Last For?
The longevity of a Parenting Plan really depends upon the needs of your family. Since children and parents schedules tend to change over time, the more flexible and understanding parents are, the less likely it is for friction to arise.
Even the most well constructed Parenting Plan may need to be adapted as time goes on. So it may be healthy to view it as a ‘live-document’ which parents can discuss should there be a need to adjust something significant.
Certainly as children grow, their needs and even the access hours may look different to what was formerly agreed. So adopting a flexible and pragmatic approach is sound advice.
Disagreements after a Parenting Plan is in Place
It is important for parents to include a clause detailing how disagreements are to be handled. This helps to provide an agreed process should friction arise. One possible solution may be to agree to visit an expert to help mediate over the contested points. The key here is to accept that the Parenting Plan has its limitations in being an evergreen document. It will likely be adjusted whether officially or non-officially as your child ages and your situation changes.
To Summarise…
A rigid approach may not always result in what is best for the child. A more child-centric and understanding approach, can help with putting aside egos and power struggles, so you can reach compromises.
The more you are able to place your child’s interests first, the better the implementation of the Parenting Plan and your child’s happiness.
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